The Enid News and Eagle, Enid, OK

November 12, 2013

Will Rogers Daily Telegrams 11-12-13

By Will Rogers
Enid News and Eagle

ENID, Okla. — MAYOR ROGERS OF BEVERLY HILLS RECORDS A WELCOME TO TOWN

BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. — Dec. 21, 1926. As Mayor of Beverly Hills, I arrived today amid big demonstrations. They mistook me for Ormiston. If not a success as Mayor, they offer to change City Hall into a tabernacleme to preach, and Doug and Tom Mix and Bill Hart to take up collection; Ben Turpin to run radio, so there will be no chance of a scandal.

Honest, they gave me a great welcome, and I want to thank everybody from the bottom of my heart and President Coolidge for a lovely nice wire. Also Al Smith and my opposition, Jimmy Walker of New York; also Hiram Johnson and Shortridge.

The only Mayor that hasn’t made a mistake so far, his honor of Beverly Hills, the best town west of Nantucket Lightship.

*****

MAYOR ROGERS OF BEVERLY HILLS TAKES NOTE OF ARMY TROUBLES

BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. — Dec. 22, 1926. I see where Brig. Gen. Reilly says that American soldiers are deserting at the rate of a thousand a month.

Well, we have one consolation. A thing like that can’t last for over a couple of months. We are refunding to the taxpayers more soldiers than we are taxes.

It’s a good thing for us that the last war was the last one.

HIS HONOR THE MAYOR OF BEVERLY HILLS, CAL.

P.S. Thank Charley Dawes for a nice wire. May Morpheus never overtake him during an emergency.

*****

WILL ROGERS’ CHRISTMAS ADVICE AND A TRIBUTE TO TY AND TRIS

BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. — Dec. 23, 1926. I am too busy replacing presents to write today. I bought some mechanical and electric things for the kids and wore ‘em out playing with ‘em myself. Don’t forget to lay by a few presents today for those who you didn’t think would send you anything. You may not have to use ‘em anyway.

P.S. I want the world to know that I sincerely wish Tris and Ty the same as I have always wished them over an acquaintanceship of fifteen years. If you are crooked it shouldn’t take you twenty years’ hard work to get enough to retire on, If they been selling out all these years I would like to have seen them play when they wasn’t selling.

*****

GREETINGS FROM WILL ROGERS AND SOME ADVICE TO MEN

BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. — Dec. 24, 1926. Merry Christmas, my constant readers, both of you.

No scandal today. There is some, but it will be more scandalous by tomorrow.

Men, act surprised this morning as if you didn’t know the tie was coming.

Yours, Will Rogers.

Enid News & Eagle is republishing Will Rogers’ daily syndicated column, Daily Telegrams, in chronological order. The collection was edited and republished by Oklahoma State University Press in 1978 and under copyright of the Will Rogers Memorial Commission.