The Enid News and Eagle, Enid, OK

Opinion

September 18, 2013

Daily Telegrams by Will Rogers 9/19/13

— WILL ROGERS SAYS GERMANY HAS HAD THREE GREAT DAYS

BERLIN, Sept. 12, 1926. — I saw a German outrun the great Finnish runner Nurmi yesterday and a Swede do it this afternoon. If a different nationality is going to beat him every day, I’m taking him on Wednesday.

This has been great three days for Germany; they won a foot race and got into the League of Nations. They feel that these two events will just set them in right for the next war.

All Channel swimming was called off today on account of rain and a wet track.

***

WILL ROGERS THREATENS TO FLY OVER ATLANTIC IF FONCK DELAYS

PARIS, Sept. 17, 1926. — I’ve been away up in the mountains of Switzerland and couldn’t get any word to you for a few days. If you didn’t yodle it they wouldn’t read it.

France said at the League the other day that her and Germany were old pals again. I guess they are; I floated down the Rhine in Germany all day yesterday and there was so many French soldiers in the way I couldn’t see the castles.

Just flew in here this afternoon from Cologne. If Fonck don’t hurry up and start, I will fly over from this end. We will fly that far over here every day.

Yours for timely and accurate news anywhere but in the Alps.

Will Rogers.

***

WILL ROGERS FINDS PARIS MEAL LIMIT IS NOT SUCH A TRIAL AFTER ALL

PARIS, Sept. 18, 1926. — They limit you here in Paris to a two-course dinner. Meats, vegetables, soups, fish and dessert are not counted in either course.

It’s two courses outside of any of these, so it’s really not such a hardship on the ravenous Americans as was at first expected.

P. S., Have stood all day at the airdrome looking for Fonck. If he don’t start tomorrow, send Ederle and Corson.

***

ROGERS RELAYS ADVICE TO FONCK TO JUMP ACROSS IF HE CAN’T FLY

PARIS, Sept. 19, 1926. — We are still setting here, looking up, waiting for that Frenchman to come by air.

These Frenchmen over here are advising him to jump if he don’t get any further than Sandy Hook.

They can stand him lighting in the water, but they can’t stand this delay.

***

WILL ROGERS WARNS GOV. SMITH TO STEER CLEAR OF THE SENATE

PARIS, Sept. 20, 1926. — I’ve been reading about the primary elections over home. Looks like everybody that remains honest is getting beat.

We all used to tell a lot of jokes about Florida, mostly because we were jealous of her wonderful possibilities, and then we knew she was able to stand it, but now that she is in real trouble, she will find everybody has always loved her and admired her at heart.

What’s the matter with Al Smith’s plans He is as long making up his mind to jump as Rene Fonck is. Being Governor of even New York beats nothing until a little later on when something better might show up.

Don’t run for that Senate. You would be sunk in there. They wouldn’t listen to Abraham Lincoln his first ten years in there if he was to come back and be elected to it.

***

WILL ROGERS ON LEVIATHAN SPEAKS FOR HOMING TOURISTS

ABOARD S. S. LEVIATHAN, Sept. 22, 1926. — On board the Leviathan with twenty-five hundred last surviving American tourists. Have all their friends meet them at boat with tip and taxi fare. Most of them have drank up their baggage already.

Enid News & Eagle is republishing Will Rogers’ daily syndicated column, Daily Telegrams, in chronological order. The collection was edited and republished by Oklahoma State University Press in 1978 and under copyright of the Will Rogers Memorial Commission.

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