The Enid News and Eagle, Enid, OK

January 18, 2014

‘Bingo, 100 points! Come on in!’

By Patsy Sorrels, columnist
Enid News and Eagle

ENID, Okla. — I have a box of ‘heart-grabbers’ that I rummage through from time to time. Usually when I am cleaning or re-organizing my desk. Things from the Internet that have caught my attention, or something someone has sent me. These two are short, but full of wisdom.

A man dies and goes to heaven.

Of course, St. Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates. “Here’s how this works,” St. Peter says. “You need 100 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all the good things you’ve done, and I will give you a certain number of points for each item, depending on how good it was. When you reach 100 points, you get in.”

“OK,” the man says. “I was married to the same woman for 50 years and never cheated on her, even in my heart.”

“That’s wonderful,” says St. Peter. “That’s worth three points!”

“Three points?” says the man, frustrated. “Well, I attended church all my life and supported its ministry with my tithe and service.”

“Terrific!” says St. Peter. “That’s certainly worth a point.”

“One point! Only one point!?!

“OK, I started a soup kitchen in my city and worked in a shelter for homeless veterans.”

“Fantastic, that’s good for 2 more points,” St. Peter tells him.

“Two points!?!”

Exasperated, the man screams back at St. Peter. “At this rate, the only way I’ll get into heaven is by the grace of God!”

“BINGO, 100 points! Come on in!”

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20 things to remember:

1. Faith is the ability to not panic.

2. If you worry, you didn’t pray. If you prayed, don’t worry.

3. As a child of God, prayer is kinda like calling home every day.

4. Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.

5. When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God want us to be still so He can untangle the knot.

6. Do the math. Count your blessings.

7. God wants spiritual fruit not religious nuts.

8. Dear God: I have a problem. It’s me.

9. Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.

10. Laugh every day — it’s like inner jogging.

11. The most important things in your home are the people.

12. Growing old is inevitable, growing up is optional.

13. There is no key to happiness. The door is always open. Come on in.

14. A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.

15. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.

16. We do not remember days, but moments. Life moves too fast, so enjoy your precious moments.

17. Nothing is real to you until you experience it; otherwise it’s just hearsay.

18. It’s all right to sit on your pity pot every now and again. Just be sure to flush when you are done.

19. Surviving and living your life successfully requires courage. The goals and dreams you’re seeking require courage and risk-taking. Learn from the turtle, it only makes progress when it sticks out it’s neck.

20. Be more concerned with your character than your reputation. Your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. No matter the storm, when you are with God, there’s always a rainbow waiting. Leave gentle fingerprints on the soul of another for the angels to read.

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Your go-to Scripture for this week is: Romans 12:2: “Do not be shaped or conformed by this world; instead be changed, transformed, by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

Keep the Faith and worship somewhere today.



Sorrels is News & Eagle editorial assistant and can be reached at psorrels@enidnews.com or at (580) 548-8140.