Riding high: Getting a different perspective

By Jeff Mullin, Commentary

May 18, 2008 01:02 am

A group called Evangelical Environmental Network, which bills itself as a biblically orthodox Christian environmental organization, has started asking “What Would Jesus Drive?”
The group, and its Web site, doesn’t propose we try to visualize the Son of God behind the wheel of a Cadillac or even a Smart car. Instead, its aim is to make drivers conscious of the environmental impact of their choice of vehicles.
In car-crazy America, of course, our vehicles are more than mere transportation.
What we drive says a lot about who we are. Young, hip bachelors like sports cars, soccer moms drive mini vans, folks on a budget drive little cars while those of greater means opt for more luxurious rides. Outdoor types, meanwhile, will opt for big, honkin’ four-wheel drive vehicles.
Of course, those stereotypes don’t hold up anymore. Soccer moms haul their troops in huge SUVs, grandmothers climb down from oversized four-wheel drive pickups, rich folks are trading their luxury coupes for fuel-efficient hybrids and the guys tooling around in sports cars are miles from being young, not to mention hip.
I’ve always driven sensible cars, with the exception of the Mustang I had in college, but had to dump because the transmission was shot.
Even my first car, most often a totally fun, non-practical, decidedly non-sensible ride, was a Plymouth Duster. It was a good, sensible, solid car, and not the least bit sporty or sexy, even after I put the wide tires and aluminum wheels on it.
Adulthood, and marriage, has brought with them another series of sensible, solid cars. We kept the Duster for awhile, along with my wife’s Chevy Malibu, then sold the Duster and got a Chevy Monza, which then was followed by a series of Honda Accords.
We had reserved yet another sensible car during a recent trip to Colorado, a Ford Taurus.
Imagine our surprise, then, when, instead of a Taurus, we were directed to a parking spot containing a Hummer. Yes, that kind of Hummer, the big, honkin’ four-wheel drive type of Hummer.
I was about to go back into the rental agency and give them a chance to rectify their mistake, when I decided to check the license number on the rental agreement against the plate on the Hummer. It matched, while the price matched that of a Taurus.
So off we went, newly-Hummer-ized, tooling away from Denver International Airport. It didn’t take long for me to realize drivers of large vehicles like Hummers have a whole different perspective on the world.
Suddenly I was looking down on smaller vehicles, like the one I usually drive. Driving a vehicle like a Hummer brings with it a sense of power, a feeling of superiority.
When small cars pulled in front of me on the highway, I jokingly threatened to crush them under the wheels of my Hummer like bugs. Parking lots brought jokes about simply shoving smaller cars out of coveted parking spots. Running over curbs was a pleasure, rather than a problem.
I was scaring myself.
What was really scary was the giant sucking sound emanating from under the hood every time I pushed down on the accelerator. It was the engine gulping gasoline at an alarming rate, alarming at least when compared to our Hondas.
There is no denying the Hummer’s cool factor. It drew the amused admiration of our friends and, particularly, their 20-something children. Everyone wanted a ride, and we took photos for prosperity.
Returning to reality was something of a shock. Suddenly we were looking up at the brutes of the road, instead of being one.
I’m pretty certain Jesus would never drive a Hummer, but it was fun for this mere mortal, even if just for a few days.

Mullin is senior writer of the News & Eagle.

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Jeff Mullin