Published: July 25, 2006 11:39 pm         

Speak or forever hold your peace

Do you speak up or do you just go along with the crowd? Think about it.

I have never been “the quiet one” of our family. If there is something I think needs saying, I say it. I used to believe it was because I was the “middle child” in the family. I really don’t think that was the real reason, but it was better than no excuse at all.

However, being in the middle with two sisters and a brother before and after me, did necessitate that I take up for myself and think for myself. The older I get the more important I think it is to do just that. I feel sorry for people who sit in silence when they really have something worthwhile to say. As we used to say, “Cat got your tongue?” Maybe they just were not encouraged to speak up and assert themselves like my family did and does.

A dear friend recently reminded me that sometimes silence is not golden — sometimes it is just plain yellow. What a powerful thought. We fail to speak up sometimes because we are just afraid to do so. Maybe we are afraid of what people will think of us or that they might disagree. A difference of opinion is good. At least it lets people know you have a brain and that it is working. What others think is their point of view and needs to be heard, too.

I am concerned about some of our precious young people of today who want more than anything to be popular regardless of what they have to do or be. Being well-liked and admired is not the same as being popular. People can be popular for all the wrong reasons. Some of the clothes they wear are indecent by my old-fashioned standards. They are much too revealing for school or church wear. My parents would have never let me out of the house in their state of undress. Never mind whether I wore what everyone else was wearing, I had to dress by my parents’ dress code.

I do remember one thing I had to wear that I detested. When it was real cold, we wore terrible long socks that were cotton and flesh colored. But no one I have ever known had skin that color. When we got to school those hose came off or we rolled them up under our dresses. This was back in the day with ladies did not wear slacks. We did wear jeans to work in, but not in public. And they did not have a zipper in front, but on the left side.

My standards have changed a lot over the years. Now ladies’ tailored slacks look perfectly fine for church and make a lot of sense in cold weather when the wind is howling around our legs. I was taught that we should wear our best to honor God in church. Our clothes might have been patched, but they were clean. And mother polished all our shoes on Saturday night so they looked nice for church. Does anyone else polish shoes any more besides me?

As you can see, I am not afraid to speak of mind. I am not judgmental of others. They have to live with themselves and live by their own set of rules, but I have mine, too.

I do believe we need to be good listeners as well as “speakers.” We learn a lot by listening. My mother was a great conversationalist because she was a good listener. She made the other person feel important and appreciated by giving them equal time. She could carry on a great conversation and visit with anyone about anything. She knew everything from sports to music to canning to books to scripture. She knew many things about many subjects because she asked intelligent questions and really listened to what the other person was saying.

Haven’t we all known people who were in love with their own voice? They babbled on and on long after they had said all they knew about something. Certainly none of us are guilty of that!

Or worse yet, haven’t we known those whose mouth starts working before their brain kicks in gear? Often they stick their feet in their mouth and have to back paddle to get out of something they said hastily.

When we speak without thinking we often have to eat crow. Better to watch our words and weigh them before we speak. Then enjoy this wonderful salad. We like it as a meal, not just a side dish.



Broccoli⁄Cauliflower Salad

1 head of cauliflower broken into chunks

1 bunch broccoli, broken into chunks

1⁄2 cup golden raisins

6 slices bacon, crisply fried and crumbled

1⁄2 cup chopped pecans or cashews

Dressing:

2⁄3 cup sugar

2 tablespoons vinegar

2 cups mayonnaise

Mix dressing and pour over vegetables. Stir and chill

Say what is on your mind, but may your words be forever sweet, because someday you may have to eat them. Think about it.



Send your comments to: Peggy Goodrich, Food For Thought, P.O. Box 1192, Enid, OK 73702.